


Some by Virtue Fall

by Vastira



Series: Aurora Shepard [1]
Category: Mass Effect
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-27
Updated: 2016-02-16
Packaged: 2018-05-16 12:18:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 17,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5828308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vastira/pseuds/Vastira
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The First Contact War didn't end after three months. It took five years. N7 Commander Aurora Shepard - spacer, ruthless, adept - is doing her best to stay afloat, but after twelve years in the Alliance playing politics and fighting skirmishes in the Terminus System, even she is feeling the strain.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own, nor am I associated with, any and all things relating to Mass Effect, BioWare and their associates. Everything belongs to them, I just play around in the universe.
> 
> This will follow events somewhat closely, but will be loosely cannon. Things have been changed, and will continue to change as we progress from Mass Effect 1 into 2 and 3. I'm trying to flesh out the story a bit more, when concerning the dark matter theories thrown into the first two games that were disregarded in 3. 
> 
> In the game, Ashley is considered a Marine, yet has a sort of made up Navy rank. She will be a Staff Sergeant, with a MOS of transport group specialist, for the purposes of this fic.
> 
> Enjoy!

**Planet Nemata, in the Sentry Omega system, 2184**

"Get your ass down! Now!" She bellowed, rushing forward and pulling up a barrier around herself and the two other soldiers. They had ducked as soon as the order left her lips, cradling their guns to their chests as a salvo of eezo missiles hurtled toward them. The missiles met the barrier with a bang and a flash, erupting in bright lights. She held onto the barrier a moment longer, opening her eyes to stare at the oncoming force. "Get the hammerheads into position!" Her words were met with the roaring of the tanks as they sped forward to meet the enemy. She dropped the barrier, chest heaving from the exertion. "Get off your fuckin' asses, learn a little caution, and get back in the goddamn field" she snarled, turning away from them. 

_"Come in Shepard."_

"This is Shepard" she scanned the horizon, lips pursed. Smoke billowed into the sky, being chased by the fires on the ground. Bodies scattered the terrain. Some were gone, lying motionless in the muck; others moved, hiding to evade fire from the enemy.

_"We need you to pull back and board. There's a SPECTRE coming in hot and we need to get out of here before they even think we were here."_

Shepard grunted. "They probably already know, Joker. Someone had to have called them here." She rolled her head and shoulders, popping the joints and sighing in relief. "Let Lieutenant Alenko know about the withdraw. Is Anderson back aboard?" Her men were pushing the batarians back. They were winning, not like it mattered though.

_"He never left the ship, ma'am."_

She nodded, though she knew Joker could not see her. "I'll have my men pull back. Why didn't they listen to me Joker, when I said this was a stupid undertaking?"  

_"I'll make sure to let them know again for you."_

"You do that." She cut the channel, opening one to her squad. "We're heading back boys, double time. Don't let those fuckers catch your asses. We're running from the scene." The batarian's own machines started to roll over the hills towards the Alliance soldiers. The tide was turning, their own hammerheads were no match against the batarian's terrain vehicles.

_"Commander?"_

"Follow the orders. Last one on the ship gets filter duty for a month." She heard a few groans on the comms, coming through on the channel on purpose. "Double time it, ya idjits. Let's get off this rock." She turned in time to see a barrage come straight for her. Her eyes widened as she dived, throwing up a barrier. She winced with each hit, her barrier flickering. She had never been strong enough when it came to defense. The anger she had been building for years hindered it, though she had no issues with this. She could hear her men backing away, hammerheads rolling past. More explosions landed around her as she tried to move. Her barrier failed at the fifth bombardment. She turned away from the oncoming force, running after the last of her men.

The batarians opened fire behind her, throwing everything they had at her. A salvo exploded into the hammerhead nearest her, causing her to flinch as debris flew her way. She tried to duck and run as best she could, but the way her shields went down and her heads up display started to scream at her, she knew it was futile. 

_"Need to speed things up, Commander. The Council's right hand has landed."_

"Busy." She said no more, putting her all into her run, throwing a few singularities behind her to slow down the charge. 

_"You should work out more. Do some laps around the cargo bay, run in place in the elevators."_

"Not helping, Flight Lieutenant." Her lungs screamed. She was a short distance runner, excelled at cat and mouse on the ground with an enemy. This was not what she had signed up for. 

Her radio crackled with static as the channel opened again, but no voice met her ears. Her heads up display violently flashed red at her. Of course she was in danger: batarians shooting her ass behind her, and a SPECTRE somewhere in the area to hinder her escape. She could see the dip in to the valley where the shuttles had landed just ahead. She was almost there, about to slide down the slope as a blast hit her in the back. She hissed, stumbling and falling to the ground. Her shields were already down, the blast searing through the armour, though not quite touching her skin. 

_"Commander!"_

She rolled as another rifle blast flew by her head. She had rolled towards the slope, hoping to keep going all the way down. She turned her head to stare at the batarians, not liking how close they were. "Get out of here LT. They're too close to me, I can't make it down to the shuttle in time."

_"I can see you from here, Shepard! Just roll down the hill!"_

She shook her head, "Too much of a risk. Get the fuck out of here, Alenko. Let Anderson know I'm haunting his ass for the rest of his life." She closed the comm before she could here Alenko's next words. Even if she went rolling down the slope, the batarians were right on her ass, leaving the shuttles exposed as they took off to dock with the _SSV Hastings_.She would not risk the lives of her men for her own, not again.

The shuttles hightailed it out of the planet's atmosphere. She stood slowly, thankful the batarians stopped firing as they came closer, a few trying for the shuttles, though failing.  She was discreet as she punched in a command on her omni-tool, her comm emitting static then sizzling as it was destroyed. She did not need the batarians following the comm channel back to the Alliance. She turned to face the batarians, a smirk on her lips. "Hey fuckers! Lets get down to bus-" Her words were cut short as the leader came up to her and jabbed the butt of his rifle into her helmet. Shepard's helm crunched under the impact, her body crumpling to the ground.

~*~*~

**Citadel, human embassy, 3 weeks before**

"This is bullshit, Captain."

Anderson shook his head, hiding a smirk behind his hand as he crossed his arms. "Watch the language, Shepard. You know this would be a great opportunity, and not just for the Alliance." He knew she was fuming, but even he knew this would be good for her. A chance to command her own ship, get to know more than just her species. "Think of this as a...training class on how to deal with multi-species events." 

She was still shaking her head, deep blue eyes, almost black, ablaze with her fury. "You, Udina, and whoever else made this decision are throwing me to the wolves. It's a political stunt." She stopped her pacing, crossing her arms and fixing her glare on Anderson. Her foot began to tap impatiently, "Who the hell would even nominate a  _human_  for SPECTRE candidacy? The First Contact War is still fresh, we've only been knowingly part of this galactic civilization for what? Twenty years? No." She was moving again, pacing to the door, waiting for it to open, then doing an about face and stomping to the railing to look out over the presidium. "We're still babies." Her voice was a whisper.

Skycars zoomed past in either direction. Traffic was not as heavy on the presidium as it was on the wards. Only the upper class, the elitists, those with enough power, money, influence, made their homes near the council. Needless to say, there were not a lot. The council managed to keep the presidium free of trash, lesser species still trying to work their way up. Anderson came to stand next to her, noting the worry twitching at the corners of her eyes. "Does it matter who put your name forth?" He leaned across the rail, eyes scanning the view. Water fountains darted the walkways, neatly hiding the krogan memorial statue farther in. "Yes, humanity is impatient. We're too excited. We've been writing about space and aliens and the vast unknown for centuries. When we finally see it, it's already been settled, and we're trying to squeeze our way through while keeping dignity intact." 

"Not doing it in a way to keep humanity in a nice light,  _sir._ " She gave him a sidelong glance, snorting. "I heard some rumors the war could have ended before it started, but it was both the stupidity of the humans and the stubborn headed-ness of the turians that kept it going for a few more years." She threw out her arm, gesturing to the presidium in view. "Those in charge want to throw a nice campaign, but we're not ready sir. Not ready by a long shot. And I am not the woman for the job. I'm the woman that slaughtered thousands on Torfan. How am I the one for this? "

He shrugged, "so we're playing politics. How has that stopped you before?"

She turned to face him, still leaning against the rail, fingers locking together. "I abhor politics, politicians, and all of this that you are trying to persuade me say yes to." She paused, holding up a finger when he tried to speak again. She turned her eyes to the view, inhaling through her nose and out her mouth. Her blood was pumping, arms and legs shaking as the adrenaline from her anger passed. "Say I do accept. What happens next?"

"You'll go about your business. Take a mission or two from the council when they have need. There's always something boiling over in the Terminus systems." Anderson pushed away from the rail, clapping a hand on Shepard's shoulder. "You don't have to decide now. Give it a few days: the duration of shore leave." He nodded to the door, "go, have some fun, explore the citadel, try and contact your mom, I know she's been trying to get a hold of you."

She grunted, scratching idly underneath her hair bun. "I'll see you back aboard the  _Hastings_ , sir." She turned, striding to the door, her movements rigid. 

"Oh, and Aurora?"

She stopped but does not turn, hands curling. "Sir?" 

"Try not to get arrested, like last time." 

"No promises...sir." She exited the embassy, stopping just outside the door to take a deep breath. "Fuck," she exhaled the word, a groan following. Getting drunk sounded like an excellent idea, but the only good place to get a drink was down on the wards. If she did that, she would be in lock up faster than a hanar could praise the Enkindlers. She started to move towards the elevators. No, she needed to let off steam, and she knew of just the place. She ignored the glances from the turians already on the elevator as she boarded. She did not care what they thought of her, their racism a tiny blip on her radar. Shepard pulled up her omni-tool, typing a message and sending it off to Alenko.

_You still on your feet, LT?_

She bounced from one foot to the other, wondering why the elevators could not move any faster. All this wonderful technology and she was still stuck in some tin can with soft music assaulting her ears. Her omni-tool beeped: incoming message.

 _Just got off the_ Hastings _. What can I do for you, Shep?_

She typed once more,  _Need to shoot something. Meet at the range at C-Sec?_  Her head was already pounding, a deep rhythm just behind her eyes. She ignored the polite cough behind her, not wanting to get into anything.

"Could you chill for a second, human?"

She turned, eyes narrowing on the taller turian. His mandibles twitched, though she was sure he was not afraid. He pointed a talon at her hands, and she glanced down. She sighed, mumbling an apology as she shook her hands. She was activating her biotics on accident, the blue-purple hue engulfing her hands. "Sorry," she mumbled again, stepping off the elevator as fast as she could when it opened. 

C-Sec was bustling. Shepard was sure most looked like frantic ants, trying to find an anchor to cling to. A batarian was being roughed up as he was pushed to the holding cells. She allowed herself a small smile seeing it. The batarians were not her number one species in the galaxy. If the batarians could all be left to rot on a thresher maw nest, she would die a happy woman. But her silly dream would not be a reality any time in her future, she knew. Slavers, mercenaries, had taken her best friend from her in her teens, attacking the colony of Mindoir. She had never been allowed to say goodbye. Not like she had not gotten her revenge years later on Torfan. Her blood boiled at the thought, her mind shoving the memories front and center. She had made many decisions on that mission, and all of them kept her up at night.

"Are you going to just keep standing in the way of foot traffic, or would you like to kindly move, ma'am?"

Shepard shook her head, eyes widening a fraction at the site of a SPECTRE. "Apologies." She dipped her head, side stepping around him. Shepard peered closer at him, noting the blue markings on his face, liking his choice in visors.

He shrugged, one finger idly rubbing his cheek. "Just try not to get run over." He continued on his way, rummaging in his pocket for a datapad. She stared after him, one brow raising in curiosity. 

"Hey Commander!" 

Aurora turned at the sound of Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko's voice, a small smile forming on her lips, though it did not reach her eyes. "Ready to hit the range? I got a pass last time I was on the Citadel. Lets me bring a guest."

Alenko nodded, eyes bright. "Ready and eager, ma'am." He blushed, averting his gaze. "Uh, just...ready, ma'am." 

"Keep it to yourself, LT." She weaved through the crowd, glancing behind her every so often to make sure Alenko was keeping up. A few krogan were hashing it out with several C-Sec officers, the officers tense, hands on their guns. "Twenty bucks the officers start it and the krogan end it," she pointed it out for Alenko.

He shook his head, "I'm not willing to take that bet."

"You're no fun." She pouted, winking at him. "Any news from the  _Hastings_?"

"Actually, Shep..." They made it down the stairs, Shepard flashing her pass, getting a nod from the asari at the desk. Alenko continued to follow her to the weapons rack. "Joker says there's talk of the turians and humans building a ship together. The council made them do it."

"A joint project between two species that still hate each other's guts?" Aurora laughed. She was already rifling through the selection of pistols, looking for her favorite Carnifex. "That's got to be the best joke I've heard in my life."

"No joke, ma'am." Alenko was checking over the pistol he chose, syncing up his omni-tool with the range's systems. "They've been working on it for years, it's about to be complete. I asked him what dock this new ship is in. Not sure how far Joker is hacking into the Citadel systems, but he gave me one. Want to check it out after this?"

She nodded as she put on her helmet. "See either a spectacular failure about to happen, or the most gorgeous ship in existence? How can I say no?"

~*~*~

**SPECTRE ship _Aves_ , en route to the Citadel, present**

She stared up at him with cloudy eyes, spitting to the side, watching her blood hit the floor. She could have sworn she saw a tooth as well, but the turian SPECTRE was already moving covering the blood with his boot. She could barely remember his name. Sarden...Sarn...Seran...Saren? She shook her head, hoping to clear some of the cobwebs forming in it. The last thing she remembered before being woken up by the turian was facing the large force of batarians. Why was she on the planet again? Something to do for the Alliance, a...colony? Mining? Whatever the SPECTRE had done to her, her foggy memory was the least of her worries. She vaguely remembered hearing stories of this particular turian, notably his disgust and hatred towards humans. The fact her face felt like ground meat, and her wrists were cracked and chaff from the bonds, gave truth to those stories. 

"Again I will ask, and if I am not given the answer I want to hear, you will become a..what do you humans call it, pincushion?" His voice rumbled, subtle, soft. 

Shepard shivered at the sound of his voice, eyes closing. She tried to breathe through her nose, but only blood and snot came flying out. She opened her mouth again, drawing a deep breath.

"What was the Alliance doing on Nemata?" He grabbed a fistful of her blonde hair, yanking her head up to lock gazes. He put his face centimeters from hers, his nose crinkling in disgust at her smell.

"What's it to ya?" She slurred, grimacing as he pulled back on her head farther, exposing her throat. 

He gave a small chuckle, mandibles widening. "The batarians seem to think you were there for more revenge, to slaughter as many as you could find. The council thinks something else. And I think something entirely different."

She wheezed, looking down to maintain eye contact. She was not liking this position. He moved his face closer to her throat, sniffing, tongue peeking out to slide up along her skin. She shivered again, trying to keep her body as still as possible. "What is it you think?" He nipped at her skin, pointed teeth drawing blood. 

_"Saren, get the hell away from her."_

Saren growled, pushing Shepard away roughly as he let go of her. She titled on the chair she was bound in, but grateful she did not fall over. She prayed to God Almighty, thankful the voice on the intercom spoke up just then. "I am well within my grounds to interrogate and question."

_"You are overstepping lines. Get to the comm. room, the council wishes to speak to you."_

Saren growled again, much louder this time. He turned his glare to Shepard, huffing once before marching out of the holding room. 

Shepard let herself relax, shoulders slumping, body going limp. If she had not been tied to the chair so thoroughly, she was sure she would have met the floor. The nice, cold floor. She closed her eyes, trying to remember, trying to get past the drugs in her system. She was on the Citadel for shore leave, Anderson was telling her about this great, big, new idea to shove her into, she had drooled over the  _SSV Normandy_ , and then Anderson was telling her of a mission in the Attican Traverse. Nemata, a planet in the same system as Virmire was rich in ore and minerals, and if the Alliance could get its hands on it, they could start churning out more warships. But Virmire was an issue as well: it was already occupied by top secret scientists and labs reporting directly to the council. If the Alliance could get closer to Virmire, set up a listening post, they could get a leg up on the rest of the galaxy. 

She hated politics.

The door opened with a  _swish._  Shepard refused to look up, keeping her eyes closed as she remained slumped over. There was no stopping her from flinching though as she felt someone dab a cold, damp cloth against her face. Her eyes flew open to get a look at whoever was trying to gently clean her up. Another turian - blue clan markings, a nice choice in visors on his head and over his left eye. SPECTRE armour pristine and clean - met her gaze. An itch began to build in the back of her mind, telling her she knew this one, but she was having too much trouble remembering to breathe.

"I apologize for my comrade, Commander." His voice is nice, calm, and she is pretty sure she can feel the vibrations of his words since he's crouched inches away. "Saren... is not always like this."

She groaned as he put too much pressure near her nose, which she knew with one hundred percent certainty was broken. His hands hesitated, continuing on slowly. "Around humans he is, or so I've heard," she managed around his ministrations. Her eyes were closing again, her head falling forward. 

He caught her, cradling her head in the crook of his neck. "Go ahead and sleep Commander. We're en route to the Citadel." She mumbled something against his armour, his ears catching it barely. "The name's Garrus Vakarian. I won't let Saren near you again." She quieted, body going slack. From the sound of her breathing, Garrus guessed she had passed out. He pushed her back against the chair, shoving the cloth into the bucket of water, now gleaming red. He unlocked the cuffs holding her to the chair, standing with her in his arms. He left the holding cell, a sigh passing his lips as Servitus met him in the hall. "I'm taking her to a bed, and you can't stop me."

Servitus chuckled, "Never said I would, Garrus." He gave Shepard a once over, mandibles twitching in a grimace. "Saren do this?" Garrus just kept walking, his silence answer enough. "He's gotten worse since his brother's death."

"That doesn't justify this. We just needed to ask a few questions, not beat her to a bloody pulp." Garrus was snarling, and only realized it when Servitus stopped walking to glare at him.

"The Alliance shouldn't even be in this system. They were never given leave to colonize the world they were on. It's not like they need any more space." He grunted a greeting to an asari as she passed them in the hall. "We may need help in the future, against the geth. Rumors are pouring all over the Citadel from quarians on their pilgrimage. Something is brewing out in the Far Rim, and the council is looking for the Alliance to help back us as a fighting force? How can we trust them if they're trying to ignore rules and regulations in place for-"

"Servitus, shut up." Garrus had stopped as well, turning to face him. "If we could just give them a chance, it might turn out different than what you, or Saren, or the hierarchy, thinks." He gave a curt nod, "Check with the pilot, make sure we're ahead of schedule. I want to be on the Citadel before our reports arrive." Servitus nodded, turned, and stalked off. Garrus could have sworn he saw dark clouds above the other turian's head, but he gave it no more thought. The hatred both sides still held onto annoyed him. Humans annoyed him, but there were a few he liked. Bailey, a C-Sec officer Garrus used to work with, was a great example of what humans could be. But not all thought the same. 

He paused again in the hall at a junction. He stared down at the human woman in his arms. A quiet growl rumbled in the back of his throat. Her wounds angered him, unsure if it was the atrocity done by Saren, or the fact a female had been assaulted. Where was he going to take her anyways? He was supposed to be following Saren's lead, but he had questioned every move since the get go. The council had sent them to investigate Alliance activity near Virmire, and Saren had been more than happy to agree to the mission. Garrus was told to accompany, to shadow. He had just been given SPECTRE status, this was his first mission, and he knew everything had already gone lyco.

What was he doing? If his father could see him now, Garrus was sure the elder turian would have a few, choice words.

His shoulders rolled as he sighed, trudging down the right hall towards the infirmary. There was work to be done.

~*~*~

**Citadel, Council chambers**

"This is an outrage!" Udina's face was turning the shade of a beet, equal parts red and purple. "The Commander's candidacy is not in question here!"

"Enough!" The turian councilor, Sparatus, looked about ready to foam at the mouth. 

The meeting with the council had gone on for a couple hours, most conversations ending in shouting matches. Saren had even pointed a gun at Anderson before being told to calm down. A small crowd had gathered on the balconies, hushed whispers flitting to and fro. Fingers pointed at Udina, Anderson, and Shepard, but only when something harsh was being said. Shepard stood straight, rigid, arms at her side. She sported faint bruising around her nose and under her eyes, though the fire in her eyes had not diminished. Garrus was still present, standing a few feet away from the humans, his arms crossed, stance at ease, and his eyes on Shepard. Udina was throwing as many glares as he could at both Anderson and Shepard. All three councilors appeared exasperated and exhausted, done with Udina's antics.

Councillor Tevos spoke up before Sparatus could instigate further. "The ambassador is right, gaining a human SPECTRE is not why we are here." She paused, nodding in direction of the humans. "You, Udina, bring up allegations of brutality by the batarians, and then Saren against the Commander. But you do not realize that being in that system, and trying to colonize another planet is against regulations. You must ask for permission before humans are given another planet."

"We were not there to colonize. We were looking for new deposits of materials to strengthen our reserves." Anderson spoke up, voice quiet.

"Again, you cannot just take resources without asking!" Sparatus ended his words with a growl unbefitting a councillor.

"Why do we need to ask for permission?" Shepard's head tilted, brow raising in question.

Saren pointed an accusing finger "see, they're nothing but power grubbing creatures!"

"Humanity needs to learn to be patient." Velarn, the salarian councillor, interjected. "Prove your worth, help the rest of the council species, and the rewards come in time."

Udina was livid, hands balled into fists, eyes narrowed. Garrus stepped forward then, having been silent the entire time. "Councilors, if it please you, allow the humans a chance." Shepard flashed him a quizzical gaze, eyes widening a little. Garrus met her stare and nodded.

Tevos nodded, "A chance then, to prove yourselves as a species. How does that sound?"

A stunned silence met her words, even the balconies were engulfed in it. Everyone was staring at the asari: bewilderment, disgust, anger, joy, to name a few emotions. "This would be beneficial for us" Anderson whispered to Udina, jerking his head towards the council.

Udina coughed into his hand, clearing his throat. "Humanity would be more than happy to serve the council in whatever delegations they see fit. We already have a candidate, if you would like to allow us the opportunity. Send them on a non-critical mission, see how we work."

"Humanity is not ready!" Saren's voice bounced off the walls. "They are nothing more than warmongers looking for more power!"

"Untrue, Saren, and you know this." Garrus threw back, shifting from one foot to the other. "How else are they to show us if we don't let them prove themselves?"

Saren snarled, "We put them in a position to do so, and they will stab us in the back. It is what humans do. Look at their history on Earth, against their own people."

The asari councilor held up her hand before Garrus could retaliate. "Saren has a point, as does Garrus. Let us convene, allow us to discuss, and we will bring you a decision shortly."

The councilors filed away to the antechamber, ignoring the growing whispers of the crowd around them. Udina turned to Anderson in a huff, thrusting an accusing finger in his face. "I should not have allowed you into this hearing! Your history with Saren did not help at all."

Shepard took a step forward, one hand on her pistol at her waste, the other pulling Udina out of Anderson's bubble. "That is no way to talk to the Captain." Her voice was low, but carried her threat just the same.

"You!" He was sputtering, "You decided to make things worse by staying behind on the planet! You couldn't leave well enough alone, you couldn't leave those batarians alone!"

She shifted her weight, shoulders shrugging. "What's done is done, Udina. There's no point in getting an aneurysm. Calm down." She waved him away, eyes and mind already on another being. "Who's your candidate, Udina?" She questioned as her mind wandered. 

"You, though I'm wondering who really pulled the strings to get you this position. Your career has certainly not been the most peaceful, and now this!" He was gesturing wildly, hands in the air. 

"Udina, this mission was not her fault." Anderson butted in, eyes on Shepard. "Brass sent us in, intel dropped the ball about the batarian raiders, and here we are now."

"If you had just left them alone, I could have salvaged this mess if-"

Shepard tuned out his voice, walking over to Garrus, who was having his own fight with Saren, though much quieter than Udina's words. She cleared her throat as she neared, hand still on her pistol, eyeing Saren up and down. He glared at her, mandibles twitching. "What do you want, _bucca?_ " 

She ignored him, leveling her gaze on Garrus, quizzical. "Why are you, a turian, sticking up for us?"

He shrugged, glancing at the older turian. "We all have to start somewhere."

Saren snorted, "No, they can go right back to Earth, grow up in several hundred years, and then we'll try this again."

"Or, you could keep your muzzle shut, and let us pave our own way," Shepard threw back, arms crossing as she shifted her weight to one foot. "We all know you hate us, Saren. Stop your whining, stop the piss contest, and get on with your life." 

Saren's mandibles widened, his cybernetic enhancements glowing brightly as if they had a life of their own. He snarled, flashing teeth as he whirled away and stopped off. "You shouldn't have said that." Garrus muttered, more than a little amusement and sorrow in his voice. "He lost his brother in the war, and blames every one of you."

She shrugged, "I understand, I do. I lost a friend to the batarians, and I blame all of them. But he needs to grow up. Yes, I do understand the irony." She flashed him a wink. "They leave me alone, I leave them alone. He doesn't seem to take that philosophy."

"He's just... a turian. We hold grudges pretty well."

"You seem to do just fine." 

"I wasn't old enough to care about the war, honestly. And I'm a very bad turian."

Her lips split into a huge grin, "Bad, eh?" She gave him another wink, chuckling as his mandibles widened and closed several times. She could only assume it was embarrassment. "Relax, I'm only joking." She cleared her throat, jerking her head towards the podiums. "Seems the council is coming back."

"That was awfully quick." His voice rumbled, quick and quiet.

Tevos spoke up, gathering the attention of the chamber to herself. "Ambassador Udina, we have decided to grant humanity this opportunity. We delegate you build a crew, we will provide a ship, and SPECTRE Vakarian will shadow your volunteer. Missions will be given to Vakarian, and he will delegate parameters to this volunteer. We will watch, read the reports, and make decisions based off of them. This trial will go on till we have decided it should end." She paused, turning to look at Sparatus, who remained stoic, and Velarn, who nodded back. "The ship humanity has just finished building with the help of the turians will be commandeered and given to your volunteer. Test the ship, test your volunteer, and test humanity."

Udina nodded, movements rigid. "We thank you, councilor, for this opportunity. We will begin at once."

The councilors nodded, turning away and filing out of the room. Shepard offered her hand to Garrus, "Hi, I'm the volunteer they picked." 

"Should have known," He clasped her hand, shaking it firmly. "It will be an... experience to work with you." 

She laughed, "You could say that." She pointed to Udina and Anderson. "You should probably come with, since you'll be shadowing me. I'm sure Udina and Anderson already have a crew in mind. And they'll want to talk about it all in the embassy office." She walked over to them, Garrus in tow, knots forming in her stomach.

It came as no surprise when she was told Joker would be her pilot, or Lt. Alenko would be the officer in charge of the ground forces. Udina, Anderson, and whoever else high up on the chain of command seemed to have been planning this for quite some time. They built the new crew with Alliance members, thinking like an Alliance military vessel. Shepard had her doubts about the entirety of it. She had seen the _Normandy SR-1_ , named by the Alliance because they had thought the ship would join their fleet, per the original instructions. The ship was sleek, beautiful, but not large. It was not a frigate, nor a transport. The _Normandy_  was built for stealth, and as such, would need a small enough crew to accommodate.

Aurora Shepard had her own thoughts on a crew and how to operate, but she knew Udina would steam roll her with his own already laid out plans. She spoke up a few times, to explain how this was now going to be a Council ship and crew, not an Alliance one, and they should branch out, to show willingness to work with other species. Just like she had predicted, Udina shot her down, barking out some comment about how humanity had to stand alone and survive independently. The last time she had brought it up, she had told him to shove it up his ass, learn how to play nice with others, and promptly left the meeting.  
  
Shepard ignored Anderson calling out to her, wanting nothing more than to give Udina a pair of nice shiners. She knew the turian SPECTRE had followed, but she ignored him also. She kept her hands at her sides, breathing steady. In, one, two three. Out, one, two, three. She stopped in the middle of traffic, ignoring the glares from people who had stumbled into her. “This is all _bull_ shit” she muttered under her breath, turning on her heel to stare down Garrus. “You! This is a council endeavor, right? Shouldn’t we be trying to incorporate more species, to show we can work with whoever lives in the galaxy with us?”

He shrugged, glancing around, checking over anyone who came near. “I would say yes, but it’s not my mission, nor am I in charge.”

“Oh, riiiiight, you’re here to supervise.” She closed her eyes and inhaled. “I’m sorry. Udina gets me worked up every time I’m near the horrible man. Look, I figure we get the ship and crew they give us, then I’ll make some changes on my own, and they can shove it. If they press too hard I’ll tell them the council made me do it. That’ll shut them up even more.”

“You could always go to the Captain. He seems to have more say when talking to your ambassador.” He took a step closer, lowering his voice. “All the people your ambassador is trying to put under your command will not be able to stay. I have toured the _Normandy_ : she’s not built for the crew size of a battleship.”

Shepard nodded, “I know, I’ve seen her.” Her omni-tool began to beep. “I’ll get Anderson away from Udina, and talk to him then about all this. One second, please.” She half turned away from Garrus, pulling up the incoming messages on her tool. _Come see me at the docks – Anderson, We need to talk – Udina, Is it true? – Alenko, New ship baby! – Joker, Have you been having trouble in bed? –Spam._ She sighed, opening the first from Anderson.

_I’ve talked to Udina, and managed to show him why it’s a bad idea to give you so many people. You’ll get a skeleton crew, not a full one, and you can add and take away as needed. You’ll keep most of the people from my own ship. And I’ll get a new crew, teach new recruits._

_Come see me at the docks when you’re ready. I want to show you around the_ Normandy _. She’ll treat you well._

_-Anderson_

She skipped over Udina’s message, did not bother to look over Alenko or Joker’s. She queued up a group message to Alenko, Joker, Jenkins, Pressly, and Chakwas, asking them if they would like to serve with her, then hit send. “How is this going to work?”

“What is this?”

“Do you shadow me everywhere? Sleep in the same room? Follow me when I have to piss?” She threw him a lopsided grin, winking. “I’m headed to the docks, Anderson wants to see me there. You’re more than welcome to come.”

He eyed her, mandibles twitching. “I actually have some things of my own to take care of before we go about this new assignment. I will meet you on the new ship in, say, ten hours? Give you time to get everything ready and set before we head out.”

She nodded, offering her hand. “Meet you on the _Normandy_ in ten hours.” Garrus shook her hand, then turned and walked away. She stared after him, a half smile on her lips as she shook her head. Turning her attention back to the task at hand, she sighed. She knew she was going to regret this.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for taking the time to read! Thank you to those who commented!
> 
> Enjoy!

**Aboard the SR-1 Normandy, inside Citadel Space**

_“Where am I headed, ma’am?”_

Not for the first time, and not for the last, Shepard sighed at Joker. “Is it really necessary to call me ma’am?” She heard a snort and a snicker, her lips twitching as well, trying to smile. Everyone in the CIC had served with her on the Hastings, and knew very well not to call her ma’am.

_“You’re so far above me now, I have to start being professional.”_

“Professional, my ass” she drawled, eyes rolling as chuckles did break out around her. She could feel Garrus shift behind her, no doubt either confused by what was going on, or amused as well. “Just…” She paused, turning her head to look at Garrus. “Is there some place specific we have to go to? Any missions the council gave us?”

He shook his head, mandibles twitching, “Not at present.”

She nodded, glancing over the galaxy map. “Take us to the edge of the galaxy, Joker. Lets get this ship broken in.”

_“Aye, aye ma’am.”_

“You can drop that now.” Her teeth grinding together. She was a tad annoyed with him, though she could not get upset. Joker knew how to break the tension on a ship, and she could not deny the new crew of the SR-1 SSV Normandy definitely had its own tension.

_“Yeah, yeah, Shepard. Don’t get your panties in a twist.”_

Shepard caught herself trying to sigh again, and stopped, lips forming a smile instead. “Put the Normandy through her paces, see what she can do.” She turned, striding to Garrus and Kaidan. “Well, while Joker flies us around, I suggest we discuss how this is going to work out.” Kaidan straightened, eyeing Garrus. Garrus was still lax, arms crossed, putting most of his weight on one foot. “Kaidan is my XO. Whenever I’m not on the ship, he’s in charge. I like being on the ground with my troops, so that might happen quite a bit.”

Kaidan snorted, “Quite a bit? Try every chance you get.”

“No back talking, soldier.” There was a grin on her face, blue eyes bright. “If you have any questions on how humans handle things on their ships, please feel free to ask anyone you are near. I have already spoken to the crew about maintaining a professional, and scientific outlook on what is going on here.”

“Humans and turians working together so soon after the war?” Garrus’ voice held his amusement. “I’m looking forward to this. I will observe, and help when needed. I will do my best to not get in the way of how you do things, Commander.”

“Shepard.”

“I’m sorry?”

“Call me Shepard, please. I understand I’m in charge, but I can’t stand ranks, and being sir’d and ma’am’d at every turn. Using Shepard seems to keep it somewhat professional, while letting me maintain my weird quirk.” She clapped her hands together, “You said there wasn’t anything specific the council wanted us to do, right? Any idea why that might be?”

He shrugged, “I’ve only been at this for a short while myself. The council seems more interested in maintaining a somewhat distant anonymity when it comes to their SPECTRES. They’ll probably contact us in a couple days on a secured channel.”

Shepard rubbed the back of her neck as Kaidan spoke up. “Sounds just like  Alliance Ops.” She nodded her agreement, as Kaiden continued, “Did you want to go over the roster, Shep? Anderson gave us a few new recruits. Oh, and I know Chakwas wants to see you for a physical. I think she just wants to make sure the implants are working out okay.” He turned to the stairs to the mess and elevator. “We also need to go over our supplies.”

“You didn’t already do that?” She followed him, knowing Garrus was close behind.

Kaidan shook his head, “Anderson said he made sure we had enough of the basics, and said we could add where we wanted. I took his word for it, and thought with the trial run we would be able to take our own stock, and get what we’re lacking.”

“Go for it, LT. Make sure we have enough dextro food for Vakarian as well.” Kaidan gave her a mock salute, vanishing to the hanger bay. “Was there-“

_“The Citadel relay is in range. Initiating transmission sequence.”_

Joker’s voice filled the mess, every person pausing their actions. Shepard stared at Garrus, meeting his gaze. “We should probably be up in the cockpit for this.”

“Yet you do not move.”

_“We are connected. Calculating transit mass and destination.”_

“I kind of like the suspense: wondering if we’ll make it or not. If I stood behind Joker, I’d be watching his fingers move along the screens, and know for sure we’re fine.” She chuckled, rubbing a cheek. “Joker’s the best damn pilot in the Alliance, probably the whole galaxy. But please, don’t tell him I said that. His ego’s big enough as it is.”

Garrus’ mandibles flared, his own chuckle filling the void. “You have my word.”

“Come on. I’ll introduce you to Chakwas, our medical officer.” Shepard motioned for him to follow, turning to the med bay. “I don’t think she’s had any experience dealing with dextro lifeforms, so beware she might seem a little eager if you ever come into the med bay with an injury.”

“She wants me to get hurt?”

_“Relay is hot; acquiring approach vector. All stations secure for transit.”_

“Oh no, definitely not. But she wouldn’t turn away the chance to practice. I’m sure we’re not that different physiologically, so there’s not too much to worry about.”

“Unless your doctor wants to see if she can transplant organs.”

Shepard stopped mid stride, blinking wide eyes. “Was that a joke, Vakarian?”

He was silent, looking almost sheepish, a claw rubbing at his mandible. “…Maybe?”

She couldn’t help but laugh at his words and expression. They began to walk again. “You’ll do just fine on this ship.”

_“Hitting the relay in three… two… one.”_

Time slowed, Shepard and Garrus seemed to freeze in place for an instant. Then it was over, both entering the med bay. Chakwas looked up and smiled, “About time you showed up in here, Shepard.”

Aurora had the decency to look ashamed. “You know I hate this place, doc.”

“That does not mean you ignore appointments made by your doctor. How am I going to keep you fit for duty if you’re constantly avoiding me?” Chakwas moved away from her console, hand on her hip as she playfully glared at the commander. “Even you need to make sure you’re in good health. And you!” She pointed a finger at Garrus who jumped at her voice. “You should have been to see me as soon as you were aboard. New to the ship means a complete work up.”

Shepard’s mouth opened and closed, mind still deciding if she should speak or not. “Technically, we’re all new to the ship, ma’am.”

Chakwas was on her again, “Then that means you should have been in here as well. You’re not helping your cause to aviod me, you know.”

Shoulders slumped in defeat, Aurora strode to a bed and hopped up on it to sit. “Do your worst, doctor!”

“Are all humans this…” Garrus paused, having an issue finding the word he wanted.

“Dramatic?” Chakwas filled in the silence with a grin on her lips. “We’re certainly stubborn, a bit too much for our own good. And I like to think the dramatic flair helps distinguish ourselves from the other races in the galaxy.” She was moving a scanner around the back of Shepard’s head, a frown replacing the grin slowly. “Have you had any recent headaches, Shepard?”

_“Uh, Commander?”_

Shepard bolted up off the bed, flashing Chakwas a crooked, apologetic grin. “Go ahead Pressly.”

_“I’ve intercepted a message from an Admiral Kahoku. He was trying to reach a contingent of his Marines out in the Artemis Tau Cluster, and they’re not responding. I responded and he’d like to speak with you.”_

“I’ll take it in my quarters. Tell him I’ll be right there.”

“Affirmative.”

Chakwas was tapping her foot, arms crossed, brow furrowed. “I will need to see you in here eventually, Shepard.”

“I know, doc.” Shepard paused, wincing. “Why don’t you get your check up now, Vakarian? I’ll let you know what the Admiral says once when we’re done talking.” He nodded his consent, albeit slowly. She was starting to hate turian faces, if only because she couldn’t read them unless their mandibles were going crazy. They needed eyebrows.

She left Garrus with the doctor, feeling somewhat guilty for pawning him off, but knowing the Admiral would not take kindly to having a turian listen in on the conversation. The war may have ended twenty-two years ago, but those who had survived still held grudges, and prejudice was high. Better safe than sorry while having the turian aboard.

She heaved a sigh as she slouched her way into the captain's quarters. Her quarters were small, but much bigger than what she was used to sleeping in. Usually she was sleeping in bunks, or the new pods the Alliance was coming out with. Her quarters now were luxurious, a definite upgrade. She hated it.

Aurora trudged the sole computer, plopping herself down in the chair and scooting forward. She turned the interface on, not surprised to see the Admiral already pacing before her. “Admiral Kahoku, sir.”

He stopped his movements, coming closer to the screen, eyes narrowing. _“Commander Shepard?”_

She nodded, “Yes, sir. I am in command of the SSV Normandy, a new ship commissioned by the Citadel.”

_“I’ve heard of it, commander.”_ He paused, arms crossing, features scrunching. _“Are we on a secure line?”_

“Most definitely, sir. I’m also using my private quarters for this.” She leaned back in her chair, eyes gazing around the room. “What may I help you with, Admiral? My navigator mentioned a missing squad?”

He nodded, _“They were sent to the Artemis Tau Cluster to look for any signs of a fugitive. They went missing shortly after their arrival there.”_

“You’ve had no contact with them since they arrived in the cluster, or since they left?”

_“Since their arrival, commander.”_ He paused again, clearly not comfortable giving out any of his information. _“I… realize you may need to know certain things about who exactly they were looking for.”_

“It certainly would help, sir.” She was becoming more than a little frustrated with the man. She understood the need for secrecy, but this was more like paranoia. “Is there someone following you sir?”

_“No, no, nothing like that.”_ He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. _“My men were trying to find Armistan Banes: a man I think has ties with a terrorist organization. My men’s disappearance only strengthens my theories. I only know they were supposed to search the cluster. I do not know what system in particular they went to.”_

She ran both hands across her face, eyes peaking over her fingers at the screen. “And you think this Banes killed them? Or whatever organization you think he was a part of killed them?”

_“It’s a possibility. It could also have just been pirates. They have been getting more and more courageous in venturing out beyond the Terminus Systems.”_ Her door beeped. She turned to it with a slight jump. _“I know you’re probably a busy woman, commander. If you can help me find my men, please head to the Artemis Tau Cluster, and report back with any findings.”_

She saluted, “Aye, sir. We’ll head there right away.” She sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose, steeling herself as the screen grew dark. She stood, turning to face the door. "Come in."

Her door opened with a whoosh, Kaidan stepping through, hands behind his back. "How are you holding up, Shep?"

She groaned inwardly, fingers flexing. "Doing pretty good under the circumstances. How're the crew doing?" She did not want to talk about herself with him, though she was grateful for his presence.

He shrugged, "You know soldiers. We don't do well with change. We moan and groan, and do it anyways."

Shepard laughed, eyes bright. "Ain't that the truth." She paused, looking him up and down. "What are you really doing here?"

He blushed, pulling a bottle of wine out from behind him. "I thought we could celebrate your promotion."

"Promotion?" She scoffed, grimacing. "More like noose. The Alliance wants me in this position so they can get away with discreet clean up or whatever. I didn't get a raise with this, and despite being told I'm under the Council's supervision now, I'm somehow still taking orders from the Alliance. Tell me how that is a promotion, and I'll drink you under the table."

He chuckled, shaking his head. "I figured you at least needed some relaxation. Hence: alcohol. And maybe someone to talk to?" His last few words came out as a question, the infliction in his voice wavering.

A sigh escaped her lips, her hands opening and closing, eyes drooping. The silence stretched on. "All right. I could use a verbal punching bag."

Kaidan fake winced, touching his heart. "I'm wounded, Shep, that you would think I would put up with verbal abuse."

She rolled her eyes, "Open the bottle. I'll find some glasses in the mess. Be right back." He nodded, turning to the bottle of wine. Aurora glanced around as the door shut behind her, thankful no one was in sight. Her shoulders drooped, another sigh leaving her as she rubbed the back of her neck. Garrus appeared in the mess from the med bay, bringing up one hand to wave. She nodded in return, features hardening. “Joker?”

“Shepard?”

“Set course for the Artemis Tau Cluster. We’ve some marines to find.”

“You got it, Shepard.”

She jerked her head towards her quarters, thumb pointing at the door. “Kaidan is trying to get a bottle of wine open now. Care to join us, Vakarian? We can discuss the information I just received.” He nodded, following her in.

~*~*~

**Above Edolus, Artemis Tau Cluster**

_“Pressly found the beacon, though it’s faint. He thinks the power is low on the beacon. We’ve scanned, and Archer swears it’s clear of any other humanoids.”_

“Take us in low, Joker. Far enough away no one can see us coming in the MAKO, but close enough we don’t have to travel too far in the all-terrain vehicle.” Aurora cocked her pistol, bringing it up to stare down the sights at the wall of the bay. “Jenkins, Wolfe: when we're outside of the MAKO, take point. Vakarian and I will bring up the rear.”

“Who gets to drive the MAKO?” Wolfe, an older veteran happy with grunt status came up beside Shepard, shotgun cradled in his hands. He was grinning happily, eyeing the tank.

Shepard snorted, “Not you, Wolfe. I remember the last time you did: the thing was in repairs for a month.”

“It was not my fault there was a cliff. No one told me.”

She laughed, patting Jenkins on the shoulder as the younger soldier paled. “Don’t worry, recruit. The worst that will happen is you’ll lose your lunch. The MAKO can travel anything, but the suspension is bouncy as Hell. We will be tossed around like a sack of dolls.”

“Very sexy dolls if I do say so myself.” Wolfe piped up, striding to the back of the MAKO, climbing in as best he could. The MAKO was overly crowded, not a lot of space for four people, three being the ‘just right size’.

“Sexy dolls?” Confusion enveloped Garrus’ words. He was calm, already packed and loaded for the drop.

“He thinks he looks good.” Shepard supplied, trudging to the tank and climbing in as well.

"Damn good!” Came Wolfe’s response. Jenkins and Garrus followed them inside the MAKO. A lot of shuffling ensued before everyone was comfortable, Shepard in the driver’s chair.

“Drop in fifteen seconds, Shepard.”

The hanger door opened in front of them, sunlight streaming through. Shepard wrapped her fingers around the wheel, her grin stretching her lips as far as they would go. Wolfe reached out a hand to the roof, his other holding the seat. Jenkins gripped the bottom of his seat in fear, eyes wide behind his visor. Garrus just sat there, not prepared for what would happen next.

“Drop in five.”

The door finished opening, Shepard revving the engine, stomping on the gas. The MAKO’s wheels spun before gaining traction. They shot forward and out of the bay, immediately falling nose first to the ground. Shepard laughed, Jenkins squeaked, Wolfe gritted his teeth, and Garrus just stared at the oncoming ground, mandibles flaring wildly. Only taking a few seconds, but feeling like eternity, they crashed into the ground, the MAKO bouncing up a couple times before coming to a rest.

“You could have used the thrusters.”

Shepard laughed once more, waving a hand. “Where would the fun be in that, Wolfe?”

“Less likely to die?” He threw back, relaxing somewhat in his chair. “I’m pretty sure Jenkins won’t move ever again.” Wolfe nudged the boy, Jenkins rocked back slightly from the contact. “He’s comatose, boss.”

She shrugged, “He’ll get out of it by the time we reach the beacon.” She turned to look at the Private. “His first drop I take it?” Wolfe nodded, settling back in. She turned to Garrus then, who was shaking his head. She flashed him a feral grin, winking. “The MAKO is a lovely vehicle.”

Garrus stared at her, skeptical. “From your laughter, I’m getting the feeling they made this tank just for you.”

“How’d you know?” She punched it again, the MAKO screeching off across the sands. “Wolfe, which way to the beacon?”

“North, north east. About 10 klicks.” His voice trailed off, leaning forward to stare at the monitor. “Boss, Archer said there wasn’t anything humanoid, but there might be something else.”

“What is it?”

“Unsure at the moment. But the computer is picking up something living beneath the beacon.” He tapped a few keys, the computer pulling up data of the planet. “Uh, Shepard? Looks like it might be thresher maws.”

“Maws? Here? And the beacon is right on top of them?”

“Might be a nest.”

“Shit.” She let out the expletive with her breath, throwing out a few more just for measure. She slowed the MAKO down, not in quite the same hurry.

“Have you ever fought a thresher maw before, commander?” Garrus was flexing his hands, eyes on her.

She shook her head, her grin long gone. “No. And we’re not trained to fight them either. We’re told if we see one, we need to run.”

“And yet the information we need is sitting on that nest. What's the plan, commander?" Garrus was fidgeting, fingers drumming against his thigh.

Shepard could not see past his opaque visor, not liking not knowing the expressions behind the words. She turned back to the road ahead of them, fingers tightening on the wheel. "Wolfe, man the cannon. Get Jenkins out of his daze and tell him to get on the machine gun. We're going to go in hot and fast, and pray to God there's only one home."

“You got it, Shepard.” Wolfe was already shaking Jenkins, the younger recruit groaning. “Get your lazy ass moving, or you’ll be doing laps in the hanger till we’re docked at the Citadel again.” Jenkins moved quickly, scrambling to the gun’s controls. “Shep, will you be giving us some barriers?”

She nodded, knowing he most likely couldn’t see her do so. “Yah, I will. You worry about shooting the damn things; I’ll worry about our asses.”

“If we get hit, even once, the MAKO is fried, boss. They spit acid. Deadly acid.”

Garrus was punching away at his omni tool, “Sergeant Wolfe is correct, Shepard. Even with shields, the MAKO won’t last long with any contact from the maws.”

“I know, I know.” She was grinding her teeth, shoulders tensing. “I’m going to be constantly moving, Wolfe, Jenkins. Don’t expect clear shots.”

“Aye, aye,” both marines grunted out at the same time.

“Vakarian, I need you to keep your eyes on the maw while I'm driving. Tell me where it is: directional advice is most welcome."

"Won't you just see it anyways?"

She flashed him a grin, however strained. "I'll be trying to maintain a barrier around the whole of the MAKO."

"You're a biotic?" His head shook. "I should have known I was getting into some crazy stuff when I signed on with humans."

She laughed, "Looks like we got ourselves a hill before us gentlemen, and then the beast just beyond. Hang tight."

She leaned forward, eyes narrowing as she concentrated. The view shimmered just outside the window, Shepard's barrier coming to life. They crested the hill, flying a few feet before landing roughly back on the sands. Shepard kept her foot on the pedal, the MAKO shooting forward towards the beacon and what looked like a Hammerhead. Smoke rose from the tank ahead of them, the beacon’s lights pulsing softly. Shepard did not slow down as she went to the right of the beacon and wreckage, pulling hard on the wheel to turn them about. The ground rumbled beneath them, the sands shifting.

“It’s right below us, Shepard.” Garrus’ voice wavered, excitement fighting down the fear.

She grunted in acknowledgement, shifting the MAKO to rear and punching it again. They shot off backwards, just as the thresher maw erupted from the ground, its screech filling the air. “Holy shit!” Jenkins yelled, turning the machinegun to the giant worm and firing. 

“Deadly ball of acid spit coming straight for us, commander!”

Shepard turned the wheel to the left, the MAKO screeching off to the right violently. Acid barely missed, scratching at the barrier. Shepard winced at the contact, closing her eyes as she pushed out again to renew the barrier. She shifted gears, not slowing down, the MAKO groaning as the tires were told to go forward. The cannon was fired, a screech from the maw following. "It's diving! Don't stop moving!" Garrus was hollering, fingers moving across the MAKO's computer and his omni tool. "I'm trying to track it, but it's moving too fast, and the heat trapped beneath the earth is covering it as well."

"Just stick with it!" Shepard yelled back, grimacing as they bounced over a dip in the ground. "Jenkins, when that thing pops back up, don't you dare stop firing! Wolfe, I need more cannon!" She turned the wheel sharply again, going right, aiming for the beacon.

They were upended, the maw tearing through the MAKO's underside. They rolled over themselves for several feet, before skidding to a stop, upside down, near the beacon and Hammerhead. The maw was diving once more, leaving a screech in its wake. Shepard shook her head, groaning as she looked out the window. The sands were shifting, the maw barely underneath them as it sped towards the MAKO. "Move soldiers!" She bellowed, scrambling to get herself out of the seat. They were not moving fast enough, Shepard being the only one out of the tank as the maw exploded from the earth, arcing to fall atop them. Shepard threw up her hands, a barrier flashing around her and the MAKO. It flashed briefly before solidifying right before the thresher maw made contact. It slammed into the barrier, body wriggling in the the air. Tentacles poked and prodded and banged against Shepard. She looked up, immediately regretting the action, staring into a mouth riddled with teeth, and lashing tongue. Sweat beaded her brow, arms shaking as the thresher maw continued railing against her biotics. 

She heard grunting behind her, only turning her head slightly to glare at Jenkins and Garrus as they tumbled out of the Mako. "Commander, Wolfe is stuck in the back near the cannon." Jenkins blurted out, eyes wide in panic as he stared at the maw. 

The thresher maw suddenly stopped, wiggling backwards, disappearing into the sands. Shepard did not trust the beast to not attack if she lowered the barrier. Her radio crackled in her ear, _"Boss... I don't think I'll be making it back from this one."_ Wolfe's words were punctuated by a sharp inhale on each word, his breath short and uneven.

Shepard shook her head, eyes closing. "Don't do this to me, Wolfe." She grit her teeth through the words, mouth forming a hard line. "Get your damn ass out here right now, or so help me..." 

_"Can't, Shep. I'm pinned to the MAKO, and bleeding out as we speak."_ He paused, his grunts coming through the radio as he tried to shift. _"I packed several grenades..."_

"Fuck you!" She let go of the barrier with her outburst, chest heaving from the exertion. "I swear to God, Wolfe..."

He chuckled, _"Get away from the MAKO, boss. I'll tell Elizabeth you say hi."_

She stared at the MAKO for only a second, hands clenched tightly, knuckles turning white. "You heard the man! Get to the beacon, now! Get under the Hammerhead!" She was motioning for Garrus and Jenkins to follow. Garrus came up to her side, already moving to put her arm over his shoulders. "You shouldn't be helping me."

"Because shaking like this, you'll make it in time before he blows a new crater in the planet?" He glanced down at her, helmet still in the way of Shepard reading him.

"Stop being logical." She leaned on him heavily, the barrier having taken almost everything from her. 

_"Boss?"_

"Go ahead, Wolfe." Garrus led her behind the Hammerhead, helping her to the ground. The ground began to rumble again, sands shifting near the MAKO.

_"Tell Maria I love her."_

The thresher maw erupted from the ground below the MAKO, shooting upwards, mouth engulfing the tank. Shepard had no time to answer Wolfe before the MAKO and thresher maw exploded into a giant ball of fire. They cringed behind the Hammerhead, covering their heads as bits of thresher maw and tank rained down upon them. Shepard stood slowly, features grim as she stared at the fires littering the sands. _Tell Maria I love her._ Her hands clenched as she shook. She roared, punching the Hammerhead, her biotics flaring. She kept her arm up, hand still touching the tank, shoulders and chest heaving. The Hammerhead now sported a new hole in the armour. 

"Jenkins." He remained silent when she spoke his name. "Grab any tags from the admiral's men that you find, and then grab the beacon's information. I'm done with this shitty world."

~*~*~

**En route to the Citadel**

The bottle of alcohol she had grabbed stared at her, half empty, taunting her with memories she no longer wanted to see, nor hear. She was going on five hours from Edolus, locked in her quarters. She had gone over the files found in the Hammerhead and on the beacon with Kaidan and Garrus, including Pressly for his knowledge on Banes and Kahoku. Kahoku's men had died for nothing, chasing a ghost on Edolus. The beacon had been a trap, just so the marines would die. Nothing in the beacon's files had lead to why. 

And why was staring Shepard down.

She reached forward, taking another swig, gulping down the burning liquid. Her door buzzed, but she doubted it was for the first time. "Come in," she slurred, eyes darting to the door as it opened. 

Garrus walked in, arms held loosely at his sides, his raptor gaze pinpointing Shepard instantly. She liked how he walked: a predator ready to pounce. "We should be reaching the Citadel in a couple hours. Joker said you wanted to meander on the way back?"

She nodded, snorting, "I needed time to think, and Joker is giving me that time."

He stopped just before the table, arms crossing. "Alenko said I should leave you alone."

She stared up at him, eyes narrowing. She took another gulp, making a face as the liquid hit her tongue. "And what is it you think, Vakarian?"

He was silent, eyes roaming her up and down, and then the bottle. He reached forward, grabbing it out of her hand, ignoring her protests as he took a swig of his own. "I think I'll keep you company." 

Shepard was staring at him with wide eyes, strands of blonde hair falling about her face and head. Her lips slowly twisted into a grin, clapping her hands once. "Have a seat, Vakarian! I knew I was going to like you."

"You might not after we're done here," He pulled a chair out, sitting down and leaning backwards, feet coming up on to the table. "Tell me about Wolfe."

She grimaced, shrugging, "What's there to tell?" She took the bottle from him as he sat, rolling the bottom on the table in circles. 

"Obviously you two have been through a lot together." He leaned forward, placing his hand on hers, the bottle stilling.

Aurora flinched at his touch but remained where she was, staring at their hands. "We enlisted together, joined the N7 program together, we both survived the Battle of Torfan." She was grinning now, mocking herself. "It had been quite a few missions without a death under my command."

Garrus shook his head, "Nothing you can really do about it, right? Wolfe made his choice."

She shoved the bottle away, shooting to her feet angrily. "We could have saved him, goddammit! We still had some time! I could have put up another barrier!"

"And who's to say the barrier would have lasted against the thresher maw? Who's to say he wouldn't have bled out as we were pulling him out of the MAKO? Would he have made it back to Chakwas?" He was eyeing her with a detached expression, mandibles flaring only briefly. He watched her pace as she tugged at her hair. "Who's Elizabeth?"

She froze in her tracks, hands clenching. Garrus regretted the question as her biotics flared along her hands, up her arms. "Don't ask me again." She growled, eyes flashing with anger as she turned on him. 

He held up his hands in defense, "Keep it to yourself then." She calmed slightly, shoulders slumping as her console began to beep. When Shepard did move, Garrus scooted closer to the computer and answered the call.

_"Commander Shepard?"_ Admiral Kahoku appeared on the screen, eyes narrowing on Garrus. _"And you are?"_

"This is the SPECTRE the Council has given the task of shadowing me, admiral. Whatever you say to me, you can say to him." Shepard plopped down in her chair, arms crossing as she huffed.

_"The Council does not need to know-"_

"The Council does not know anything at the moment, sir." Garrus interrupted, voice sharp. "We have found your team, all dead. They fell for a trap, most likely laid by this Armistan Banes fellow you mentioned to the commander before."

Kahoku's face fell, features growing dark. _"Then he knows we're after him."_

"We, sir?" Shepard leaned forward, shaking her head. "We found your marines, though it's a theory that Banes is the one to plant the beacon." She paused, glancing at Garrus who nodded. "Who does this man work for, admiral? If you want our help to continue, knowing more information on Banes would be helpful."

He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, _"Armistan Banes is an operative of Cerberus."_

"Cerberus? But they're a black ops organization."

_"They went rogue about two months ago, stating the Alliance was getting too cozy with aliens and the Council."_ He leaned forward, disappearing off the screen, and then reappearing. _"I'm sending you everything I know, or could get my hands on about Cerberus. I found a few outposts I want to check out. With your help, we might be able to hit most of them quickly, before they know what happened."_

Aurora nodded, a small smile on her lips. "We can head straight to the one closest to us. But the secrets need to stop, admiral. You need my crew's help, you need to be upfront with us." 

He grinned in return, _"Read over those files, commander. Once you hit the first base, I'll tell you everything you want to know."_


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the delay.
> 
> Enjoy!

Shepard stared at her mother, mouth set in a grim line. Hannah Shepard stared back, short stature not making her demeanor any less foreboding. “And when were you finally going to send me a message? Before or after the Council made you a SPECTRE?” Hannah broke the stare off, blue eyes flashing dangerously as she looked her child up and down.

Aurora sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. “I was planning on it…”

“In the next life? Hmm?” The elder Shepard had her arms crossed, eyes narrowed. Her Alliance uniform was pressed neatly, medals flashing in the light of her office.

“It’s not like I’m dead, mother.” The younger Shepard huffed, arms crossing, mimicking her mother. “I’ve been busy.”

“Oh yes, doing Kahoku’s dirty work while hoping the Council will send you on a mission.” Hannah shook her head, the view screen buzzing once with static, then straightening back out. “You called for a reason, Aurora, what is it?”

Aurora nodded, leaning forward, arms on her knees as she interlocked her fingers. “I need everything you know about Cerberus and Armistan Banes.”

Silence met her words, Hannah stiffening. It drew on for seconds, Aurora suddenly regretting having called her mother. “How do you know Banes, Aurora?”

“Kahoku sent men to find him, and they all winded up dead. Kahoku then said he’d tell me everything after I started going after Cerberus bases, but the man has been silent.” She paused, rubbing her cheek, eyes focusing on the keyboard. “The bases we have gone to have… been eerie. The experiments this organization is doing, for _the good of humanity_ , are appalling.”

“Yes. Cerberus used to be a black ops under the highest ranked Alliance officials. They went rogue… hm, it’s been a while now, actually.” Hannah disappeared from view, coming back with a stack of data pads. “I’ll see about getting you clearance to view everything, but it won’t sit well with quite a few people. You’re not Alliance, but you’re not part of the Council yet.”

“I’m not a rogue agent, mother.”

“No, but others don’t know that. All people see is Commander Shepard was given to the Council to be tested to become a SPECTRE. You haven’t proven yourself to be loyal to the Alliance, to anyone.”

She sighed, shaking her head. “It’s not like I volunteered for this shit.”

“Language, young lady.” Hannah smiled then, “Anderson and Hackett believe in you. Just… try not to mess this up.”

“Hackett? He’s involved in this?” Aurora groaned, falling back in her chair as her shoulders slumped. “Now I know I’m done for.”

“Let me get you clearance, and I’ll send you all the files on Cerberus before and after they defected from the Alliance.” Hannah paused, head turning to her door. “I’ve got to go, sweety. Be safe, and try to call for more than just business. I want to hear you’re getting married next time you call!”

The screen went blank before Shepard could respond, eyes wide in disbelief. She chuckled, rising to her feet and stretching. Her shoulders popped, a satisfied groan escaping her lips. She strode to her bed, files and data pads strewn about the hard mattress, all pertaining to Cerberus and the bases they had infiltrated and taken out. She frowned as she stared down at the files, something in the back of her mind tugging at her thoughts.

They had fought creepers, a subject Cerberus labeled as “Thorian Creepers,” though why that name was hard to make out. The files had mentioned receiving a shipment of the zombie like humanoids from another planet, though it used code, not the given name. Cerberus kept an organized and detailed file of everything they had done in the bases, though even Shepard could not keep some of the images out of her mind. She did not know whether the experiments they had found were volunteers from Cerberus’ own ranks, or victims from kidnappings. Either way, she was liking the organization less and less.

The fact Kahoku had gone silent did not bode well with Shepard either. Cerberus had to be on the admiral’s tail, which meant Cerberus now knew about her and her crew’s involvement in trying to find Banes. The name meant nothing to her, but the dead marines Kahoku had been looking for were reason enough to find and end the man.

Her door beeped, breaking Shepard away from her thoughts. “Come in.”

Kaidan strode in, his face white. “Shep, you need to come right away.”

She frowned, following him. “What’s wrong Alenko?”

“Pressly and a few older soldiers cornered Garrus on the elevator. It hasn’t gotten to violence yet, but I’m not sure they’ll be satisfied with just words.”

Shepard’s hands flexed, a frown hardening her features. She outpaced Kaidan quickly, trying to reach the elevator before anything happened. She could hear Pressly barking out his words, most likely with his arms crossed, scowling at Garrus. “Turians don’t belong on this ship.”

“And who gave that order?” Shepard returned just as she rounded the corner, trying to keep her stance light. She did not need the aggravation of Pressly, or anyone else, undermining her authority. “Last I checked, I was still commander of this vessel, and I welcomed Vakarian aboard whole heartedly.”

“You can’t trust him, commander!” Simmons, a gruff and scarred engineer kept his voice low, but threatening. “Turians attacked us first. He could be planning his already!”

Garrus snorted, shaking his head. Shepard threw him a glare, eyes locking on to his own. “Do you trust me?” She threw back at the elder soldiers, eyes hard. “I’m in charge here, and I trust this turian.”

“You of all people should know not to!”

Shepard stiffened, “Let. It. Go.” She punctuated each word, not quite snarling. “If I hear, or see, or am told about this happening again, I will throw anyone who challenges my authority out of the airlock.” She looked each soldier in the eye, stopping briefly, but pointedly, at each in turn. “Vakarian is a part of this crew. And we’re part of the galaxy now. No sense in yelling at the other species to get off our lawn. Am I understood?”

“Yes ma’am.” All three stated in unison, voices sullen. Pressly was still glaring daggers at Garrus, his bottom lip stuck out like a child. “Just you wait. They’ll betray us all.” Pressly muttered as he turned to walk away.

Shepard took two long strides, grabbing Pressly by the shoulder and spinning him back around. “Apologize to Vakarian, right now!” She barked out, livid at this display. She took a steadying breath, trying not to shake.

Pressly paled, eyes switching from Shepard to Garrus and then back again. “It’s okay, commander. They don’t have to apologize.” Garrus spoke up, coughing into his hand, more than a little embarrassed.

Shepard shook her head, grinding her teeth. “You will apologize right now, soldier.”

Pressly stared at Shepard a moment longer, his breath quickening. “S-sorry, turian.”

“His name is Garrus Vakarian.” Shepard shifted her weight to one foot, hands curling.  The urge to poke Pressly in the chest had her twitching. “Use his name, Pressly.”

Pressly licked his lips, eyes moving back and forth again. “Sorry Garrus Vakarian.”

“Dismissed, soldier.” Shepard waved him off, Pressly disappearing quickly. She turned to Garrus, a sarcastic half smile tugging at her lips. “Are you okay?” She glanced at Kaidan who was relaxing, legs spread, and hands behind his back.

Garrus nodded at her, “It’s just words-“

“Until it turns into actions,” she returned, hands on her hips. “Kaidan, I want everyone in the CIC tomorrow for a briefing at 0800. I will not stand for this.”

He nodded, “I’ll make sure they’re there, Shepard. I know I’ve heard…whisperings about Garrus being aboard. Some have been because he’s turian, others have been because he’s a SPECTRE. No one likes the Council.”

“Who does like politicians?” She heaved a sigh, rolling her head, neck popping. “I want everyone to know we are now a part of the Council, under their jurisdiction, and if anyone wants to leave, we will head to the Citadel immediately.” She paused, “Or have Anderson meet us out here.”

“Do you want me to contact him?”

“You know what? Why not. There’s bound to be at least one to take my offer. Thank you Kaidan.”

“Anything for you, Shepard.” He mock saluted, turning on his heel and heading up to the CIC.

She pulled a face at his words, leaving it alone for now and turning back to Garrus. “What did the engineer mean by you of all people should understand not trusting turians?” Garrus asked, finally stepping out of the elevator. His mandibles fluttered as he looked Shepard up and down.

She smirked, rubbing the back of her neck. “My father died when I was three.” She looked away, eyes un-focusing. “He was the commanding officer in charge of those who found Relay 314, and tried to turn it on.” Her eyes went to Garrus’, flashing. “He died in the skirmish that started the war.”

Mandibles flared again, Garrus turning away. “And you don’t harbor any ill will?”

“I…” She chuckled, smiling. “My mother says I was the worst teenager she had ever met. I’m pretty sure all parents say that about their children though.” She shrugged, “I made peace with not having my father a long time ago. I followed in his footsteps: enlisting in the Alliance, volunteering for the N7 program. Anderson and my mother go way back, and he stepped in to help her with my rambunctious self when she needed it.”

Garrus nodded, one claw rubbing at his cheek. “I’m sure my own parents have several stories to tell about me as well.”

“All children are-“

 _“Shepard, got an incoming message from Kahoku. It’s just coordinates though. And one word: help.”_ Archer’s voice echoed in the hall.

Shepard looked up, staring at the ceiling. “Make sure Joker knows them. Take us there immediately.”

_“Changing course.”_

Shepard motioned for Garrus to follow her, leading him to her quarters. “We need to go over what we found at the last facility. The files on the Thorian creepers don’t sit well with me. Everything about Cerberus doesn’t sit well with me.”

“Same here, Shepard. I’m still not sure what they’re trying to gain with these experiments.” The door opened, and then closed behind them. He took a seat at her table, Shepard striding to the bed. She collected everything from it, dumping the files and data pads unceremoniously on to the table. Garrus leaned forward, snatching a data pad from the air before it hit the table. “There’s almost too much here. How do they have all this funding? And they seem to be everywhere, all at once. Do they have so many humans amongst their ranks?”

Shepard slouched into the other chair, taking another data pad in hand. “I have a sneaking suspicion the Alliance is still funding them.”

“Do your leaders not know what Cerberus does with the money?” He pulled as much as a face as his rigid features would let. “The turian hierarchy funds certain organizations, but they do say no when a line begins to be crossed.”

“Humans aren’t… as shy or squeamish, I can assure you of that.” There was a knock at her door, both turning to it. “Come in.”

Kaidan walked in, features grim. “Joker says we should be at the coordinates in 3 hours.”

Shepard nodding, motioning for Kaidan to sit. “What is your take on what we have gathered so far?”

“Cerberus needs to be stopped.” He took a seat, frowning at the pile on the table. “We need to figure out where they’re getting the subjects for their experiments; like the Thorian creepers.”

Both Shepard and Garrus nodded in agreement, Shepard throwing her pad back on the table. “Kaidan, put some feelers out there. Someone has to know something.”

“What about the Shadow Broker?” Garrus spoke up, eyes flashing to Shepard’s in an instant.

She inhaled sharply when they met gazes. Time seemed to slow, her breathing the only thing she could hear. Then she was shaking her head. “There’s nothing I can bargain with. And I don’t know about you two, but I do _not_ make enough to pay for those kinds of rates.” She leaned forward, frowning at the data pads. “No… Someone out there must know something. Maybe a defector from Cerberus? Washed out agent? Even someone in the Alliance trying to hide? Loosen some lips.”

“And how should I be going about loosening these lips you want me to magically find?” Kaidan retorted, snorting as his arms crossed loosely.

“Charm? Drinks? You’re good looks?” Shepard shrugged, gesturing wide. “I’ll see what my mother can find. You focus on who you know.” She turned to Garrus, “Do you think anyone in the hierarchy, or even someone amongst the Council attendants might know something about Cerberus?”

He shrugged, “Maybe. I’ll see what I can find. Honestly, this was the first I had heard of the organization. They may be more secret than we think.”

“Which would be bad for business.” She nodded in agreement. “Let’s see what Kahoku is leading us to, then we’ll go about finding where these creepers are coming from.” She stood, waving a dismissal. “Go suit up Vakarian. Kaidan, let Jenkins know I want him suited up as well.”

“Anyone else, Shep?”

“No.” Her features darkened, eyes hardening. “I want a small infiltration team. We’re going to hit whatever these coordinates lead to fast and hard.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“Clear!” Jenkins brought his rifle up, rounding the corner, eyes forward.

Shepard waved her hand, Garrus following the direction and following Jenkins. Shepard was close behind, pistol aimed low. Her eyes scanned the corridor, not liking how enclosed the base was. Cerberus had made this one smaller than the others they had been to. They had yet to meet resistance as well, making Shepard’s fingers itching to shoot something. She wanted nothing more than to smash someone’s face in. The eerie silence they continued to find did nothing to quell that desire.

Jenkins suddenly pulled to the right into another corridor, turning in a circle, back slamming against the wall. “Two up ahead.” He hissed, voice low, jerking his gun in the direction they were heading.

Garrus went to the left, crouching low as he peeked around the corner. Shepard followed Garrus, fingers tapping her pistol as she flexed instinctively. “Let them go by, then we’ll-“

“No way Shepard is here already.”

“I swear I heard Wilkens mention the ship came into range.”

“And you’re to tell me she’s looking for Kahoku?”

“That’s what they’re saying. Not like she made it. The bastard’s been eaten by those insect things.”

“Rachni, Lawrence. They’re called rachni.”

“They’re still insects.”

The two came into view, not slowing down as they walked by the trio. Their lab coats fumbled between their legs, hands a bit too animated as they continued their conversation on whether or not rachni had evolved from an insect or not. Shepard made a mental note to ask Garrus what a rachni was the next time they were aboard ship, but for now, she reached out with her hand towards the scientists. Her biotics enveloped her arm as she yanked down. The scientists were pulled down to the floor violently, knocked unconscious from impact. She waved her hand down the hall, Jenkins and Garrus moving quickly, guns raised.

She took another look at the civilians, hands curling. She wanted nothing more than to put a bullet in between both their eyes, knowing they would go back to the same work, same experiments, all _for the sake of humanity_. She shuddered once, turning on her heel and following her men down the hall, pistol up, eyes alert.

Jenkins was stopped again at the end by the time Shepard caught up with them. He was kneeling, looking down the barrel of his rifle. “Noises. I think just beyond is the main room.”

“Where is everyone?” Garrus muttered. She glanced, still trying to understand the subharmonics his voice gave out.

“Maybe they all gathered in one place so we could defeat them easily.” She whispered back. She smirked, eyes turning back to her helmet’s readout. Even though the base was smaller than the others, it still followed the same layout. Looking at the layout now, Jenkins was right: the main room was around the corner. The main experiments, the rachni, Kahoku’s body was just around the corner. “I’ll go in first, throw up a singularity. Jenkins follow it with a flash grenade. I don’t want any of them fighting back. Vakarian…” She paused, head tilting to the side. “Do what you do best.” His mandibles flared in what she guessed was a grin as he tightened his grip on his rifle.

Shepard crouched past them both, pistol aimed in front. She took a steadying breath, sweat rolling down her brow. She counted to five, striding around the corner, biotics flaring up as she threw out a singularity. She ignored the shouts of alarm as she tucked and rolled. She spared a glance behind her as she shot to her feet. Jenkins was already throwing the flash grenade towards the mess of people being sucked in to the singularity. Jenkins’ eyes widened as either someone not close enough to the singularity, or someone who was a lucky shot, fired. The impact sent Jenkins to the ground. Garrus was returning fire already, ducking low as he came around the corner. He grabbed hold of Jenkins, dragging him along towards the shelving between them and Cerberus.

Aurora kept her eyes on the ground as she rounded a stack of crates. They shifted when she pressed her back against them, her head peeking out. She jolted back behind them as someone fired towards her. The singularity was still pulsing softly. The flash grenade had gone off, another wave of shouts and random fire in the aftermath. She turned to glance back at Garrus and Jenkins. Jenkins was looking at her, thumb in the air he nodded. He had already patched up the wound in his side.

She nodded back, throwing up a weak barrier around them. She breathed once, twice, and rounded the crates, pistol drawn. Her other hand blazed, throwing out a warp, and then a push. She fired slowly, taking her time to aim and shoot. She knew civilians were among the bodyguards, and knew the Alliance would condemn killing them. Scientists were useful, if paid the right price. Garrus was up, still behind the shelving, but not hiding anymore. He fired at anything getting too close to Shepard. Before long the scientists were huddle together, hands behind their heads, their bodyguards lifeless on the floor.

“Radio for evac and tell Joker to let Alenko know we have prisoners.” She shot the order to Jenkins, who held his side, pallor like a ghost from the pain. She snorted in disgust at the few before her, safe behind a barrier. “What’s the cage in the back?” No one twitched at her question, all eyes on the floor. “I asked a question, and I hate repeating myself.”

“We keep the rach-“ The only one to speak up was elbowed into silence, all resuming their previous position hurriedly.

Shepard paced around them, tapping the barrier she had made, watching it buzz and wrinkle on the contact. “I already know rachni are kept here. And I know Kahoku is here. What is. The cage. In the back?” She punctuated her words, drawing them out slowly, licking her lips. She continued to circle them, eyes narrowing. They still did not answer, did not move. She shrugged after a few moments, lazily holding up her pistol, barrel facing the scientists. Her barrier flickered as she put less effort into keeping it there. She could have sworn she heard Garrus snicker behind her, but she did not turn to look. Her eyes were on the scientists as the ones facing her visibly paled, staring at the gun. She smirked, a lopsided half smile, “No sense in dying for Cerberus, right? I just asked a question.” Her finger twitched towards the trigger, eliciting a few gasps.

“We used it to watch the rachni attack whatever we put in the cage with them!”

“Alex!”

Shepard chuckled, holstering her pistol and letting the barrier drop. “Thank you gentlemen. You’ve been grand.” She stepped around them, heading to the cage. “Vakarian, keep an eye on them.”

“Commander? Alenko says he’ll be here in five with people to round up the scientists and any intel we can salvage.” Jenkins was nodding to a voice on his radio. “And Joker says we need, need, need to get another MAKO.”

“Three needs? Really?”

“Yes commander.”

She chuckled, shaking her head. “I’ll see what I can do.” She now had eyes only for the barrier keeping the rachni inside the cage. If she squinted and tilted her head she could see bones and a whole body in the cage with the rachni, hoping against hope it was not the admiral. Lips pursed, she clenched her hand and jabbed at the nearest console connected to the cage. The barrier flickered twice, then vanished, and the rachni were on her in an instant. She grunted as she threw one into another, pulling the third into the pile. All three rachni together, Shepard threw a singularity at them, and wanted nothing more than to laugh as they flailed helplessly, screeching. She brought her hands together, eyes closing as she exhaled. Her arms flashed in the purple hue as she yanked them apart, the rachni ripping apart in tandem. Her nose wrinkled as blood sprayed.

She dismissed the singularity with a wave of her hand, stepping forward, doing best to not step in the puddles of blood and flesh. She reached the body, Alliance blues and admiral strips screaming at her. She crouched down, pulling a rachni body part off of the admiral’s face. Kahoku stared up at her, features frozen in fear.

“Shit.” She breathed, shaking her hand to get the remnants of rachni flesh from her armour. Her eyes roamed the admiral, not picking up any signs of struggle, nor any obvious wounds the rachni would have made. Except for the bits of rachni falling on him, he was pristine. She chewed her bottom lip, not liking where this was going. Chakwas needed to do an autopsy, to confirm Shepard’s thoughts. Poison? Torture? The admiral’s dress blues hid what Cerberus had done to him underneath.

“Commander?”

She turned at the sound of Garrus’ voice, head shaking. “He’s dead, but not by rachni.” She gestured to the pieces littering the floor. “What are these?”

He stared at them, mandibles twitching once, then stilling. “Something that should have remained dead. They were a sentient war-like race hell bent on destroying the galaxy. The krogan were the only ones capable of fighting back. The rachni wars were…a dark time in the galaxy. They should have been wiped out by the krogan.”

Her nose wrinkled. “Cerberus got a hold of them somewhere. We need to find a manifest in these files, and we have to find them now. I’m done chasing ghosts, and the admiral is gone.”

“And what will you do if there is nothing in any of their databases here?” He shifted from one foot to the other, eyes on Kahoku’s body.

She sighed heavily as she stood. “Ask you to pull some rank? I don’t know. I need to sit and think, maybe have a drink.” She pounded her helmet, “None of this is making any sense, and we’re not really any farther from where we started this nonsense with Kahoku. I’m not even sure…” Shaking her head, she stopped. “Let’s just focus on getting these scientists to the Alliance, and getting the admiral a proper burial.”

He nodded his agreement, eyes never once moving away from the admiral. His fingers tightened on his gun, shoulders tensing. “Alenko should be here any minute. I’ll help Jenkins get to the doctor.”

“Thank you Vakarian.” She flashed him a grin, not quite reaching her blue eyes. Her thoughts went back to Cerberus, not liking how mysterious the organization was proving to be.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

“We’ll meet you at the Citadel, Anderson. Shepard out.” She closed the channel, leaning back on her heels as she crossed her arms. She looked around the briefing room. FTL comm link, big enough to fit everyone, but not enough chairs for everyone to sit. She did not know where the compromise had been in building the _Normandy_ , where turian engineering started and human ended. A few things were different, like the CIC, and where her quarters were placed when it came to viewing the mess. But overall, the ship just felt… right. Nothing screamed turian, nothing screamed human. It was just the _Normandy_.

 _“There’s another message for you, Shepard.”_ Archer’s voice was quiet, but it echoed in the vastness of the briefing room.

“Put it through Archer. I’ll just take it in here.” Shepard let her arms go slack, swinging down to her sides.

_“Aye, aye.”_

She did not have to wait long for the static to begin, then silence, like a microphone held open. Aurora frowned when she realized no image was going to follow this call. She did not like being left in the dark. _“Commander Shepard!”_

“Who am I speaking to?” The words came out harsher than she intended, but regret she did not have.

_“I am an agent of the Shadow Broker, and I’m contacting you to finish a deal my employer had made with Admiral Kahoku.”_

“Ah.” She licked her lips, trying to stop them from tugging upwards. “I’m not the admiral though, am I? Why would I finish the deal?”

_“Because we both know you want answers.”_

Well… shit. She pinched the bridge of her nose, sighing. “All right. What was the deal brokered between the admiral and your employer?”

She could almost hear the satisfaction and smirk in the agent’s voice when he spoke. _“We gave him a lead on Cerberus, a pro-human organization he was after. In return, we asked for any information he might find when he chased this lead.”_

“That doesn’t really benefit me though.” She interrupted. Her foot began to tap, suddenly impatient and very done with the conversation.

There was a long sigh on the other end, _“My employer realizes this. We have new information that may benefit your lead with the rachni.”_ Shepard’s eyes widened. How had they known about the rachni? It had only been an hour since they had left the planet. _“We will give you what we know about their shipping manifests, if you give us the information you received from that base.”_

Her lips pursed. “How do I know you won’t just back out of this once I send you the data? Why don’t I just give it to the Alliance like a good soldier?”

_“Because we know you have no other choice. What will the Alliance do with the data? Read it, and then file it away in some cabinet, never to see the light of day again? You know this would be the only way someone would be able to use it against Cerberus.”_

Her hands curled, fingers dinging into her palms. She wanted to accept, needed to accept the deal. She had to find where Cerberus had received their rachni, especially since the sentient race was supposed to be extinct. She relaxed then, nodding. “Fine. Deal. But I want confirmation of you sending your intel to me first, before I even think about sending you our information.”

 _“We would not have it any other way, commander. You should be receiving the shipping manifests as we speak.”_ Her omni-tool beeped in confirmation, Shepard surprised once more. _“We will expect the information by the time you reach the Citadel to meet Anderson. No sense in putting it off.”_

The channel went silent, Shepard left staring at a wall with wide eyes. She shuddered, not liking the Shadow Broker literally knowing everything. Her hands uncurled, fingers flexing. She was agitated, and by more than just Cerberus. What was she supposed to be doing? The Alliance was silent, and the Council was silent and most likely just stringing her along. Kahoku was dead. She had already lost a solider. What more was to be given before anything started happening with the SPECTRE initiation?

She stepped towards a chair, plopping herself down and sprawling. She slouched heavily, sighing blissfully as her body relaxed, eyes closing. She did not look up when the door _swished_ open, and someone padded their way to her. “The rachni are a problem I have to tell the Council about.”

Her eyes flew open, on Garrus in an instant. “Are the rachni really _that_ bad?”

He nodded, taking a seat opposite her. “One queen can turn out thousands in but a month. Probably closer to mere weeks.” He leaned back, arms crossing, legs sticking out. His eyes focused on her, too intense for Shepard. “They need to be dealt with, and quickly. The rachni cannot be underestimated. Nor can the fact Cerberus obtaining them be underestimated. This organization has too much power and influence.”

“And money,” she agreed. She turned her gaze away, a shudder running down her spine. She took a steadying breath. “I just received the shipping manifests of the Cerberus base. We need to go through them, see where a large shipment of the rachni came from.”

“You got the manifests? From who? They weren’t in the base’s files.” His eyes narrowed, head tilting. He sat up a little straighter.

She smirked, rubbing her cheek. “An agent of the Shadow Broker called. Gave me a deal. While I may not like making a deal with the man, we needed the information.”

“And the cost?”

Shepard winced at the tone of his voice, stern, rough. A little part of her liked it. “We give them everything we found at the base.”

“Commander….” He growled, though not menacing.

She was grinning now, “What? I did make copies you know.” She winked at him, eliciting a chuckle. “Now come on,” she punched in a command on her omni-tool, synching with his. “We have these manifests to go through, and figure out where the rachni came from. You might as well help me while we fly to the Citadel.”

"I’m not being paid to look through manifests with you.” She could only hope he was smirking, not quite sure what this particular flutter of the mandibles was. At her silence he coughed into his hand, glancing away. “I was only joking.”

She snorted, “We’ll get to be so comfortable around each other one day, that we’ll never stop joking, even when we’re facing death.” Her eyes were on the data, scrolling through the lists.

“I’m sure I’ll be out of your hair in no time.” He returned, turning to his omni-tool as well.

_Nepmos, Erebus – Incoming: five cases, all males. Outgoing: 1 case, serum._

_Binthu, Yangtze – Incoming: 1 case, all males. Kahoku. 1 case, serum. Outgoing: N/A_

_Nepheron, Columbia – Incoming: 4 cases, serum. 5 cases, creepers. Outgoing: N/A_

_Noveria, Pax – Incoming: N/A. Outgoing: smuggle as many males as possible. Note: watch the matriarch._

“I think I found something.” She licked her lips, “Says they’re getting the rachni from Noveria? There’s also a note saying they need to watch… the matriarch? That’s an asari, right? In her prime?”

Garrus was staring at her, eyes and mandibles wide. “What?” He managed, choking on the word.

“An asari matriarch is being watched by Cerberus, and they’re getting their rachni from somewhere on Noveria.” She said the words slowly, as if to a child. She was unsure where the surprise was coming from, not sure why he was suddenly stricken silent.

He got to his feet in a hurry, striding to her. He grabbed her wrist, pulling it up to stare at the words on her omni-tool. He found his words, voice grim. “Noveria is an ice planet the bureaucrats use for research. Weapons of every kind, omni-tools, implants, whatever you can think of, there’s a major company with a station on Noveria researching every angle to make and sell their product. It’s all hush hush. Even the Council has barely any influence and say on the planet.”

“But, as a SPECTRE, technically we could go there, land, and find this matriarch? Which would lead us to the rachni, and would lead us to stopping Cerberus? Maybe find their plant in the asari’s employees.” She stood, eyes on his hand still holding her wrist. His three fingers enveloped her, making her look smaller than she knew she was. She looked up into his eyes, him towering above her. “First, the Citadel.” He nodded, releasing her. “Then, we go to Noveria.”

“I’ll go to the Council and ask them to send word ahead.” He turned from her, to the FTL comm link.

She reached out, tugging at his arm. “Why don’t we wait till… _after_ we have the evidence we need from Noveria?” She chewed her bottom lip, looking a bit sheepish. “I know the Council does not care for me, or our race, and going to them not even a little cocked, with no evidence, will only make things worse.” She let her arm drop, a mischievous grin stretching her lips. “We’ll go to Noveria first, then to the Council with whatever we find. Deal?”

He stared at her, mandibles fluttering. He finally chuckled, “Deal. First we'll stock up on the Citadel, then we'll deal with Noveria.”

**Author's Note:**

> Constructive criticism, comments, and kind words are always welcome. Thank you for reading!


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